I just want to be mad!

Wow. Ever feel that way?

This moring as I broke out my Sunday School lesson to read, it was all about a thing I have been putting up with for years.

I knew here lately I had been letting it get to me, but I really didn't realize what a festered sore it had became.

Just being transparent here. I tried to read the scripture text, picking it up, then putting it down. I didn't want to hear it. And to be matter of fact I kinda still don't. I pretended I didn't understand what it was saying, so I broke out the amplified version. Never should of done that for it was VERY clear there.

I couldn't even go on to the lesson. I grabbed my phone and headed straight for solitaire. I won't read it and I won't think about it, either.

You know, some times we have a little ant bite and it itches but we ignore it thinking it's no real problem, I mean it's just an ant bite.  Then one day we look down and think I really need to doctor that, but we are to busy. So we go on about our way.  Next thing we notice it's a little pusy, and we think when I get home, I'll take care of that, but we don't.

UNTIL that morning we wake up to find some red streaks. What was minor is now septic. We now have poison, disease traveling in our bloodstream, straight to the heart.

If we are smart, we'll head straight to the physician. Now, we have to get an injection, take some meds, pay a big bill, blah, blah, blah, on top of being in pain.

I've pretended to give the issue to God. At times even pretended it wasn't bothering me. Now this morning I wake to find a septic situation. Part of me doesn't even want to go to the physician. Someone has wronged me and I just want to be mad. Yet I realize, it has poisoned me.

Yet God....He is so sweet, kind, and gentle.

Please excuse, me while I head over to the physician to get this thing lanced. Oh I realize it's going to hurt, but if I don't I chance dieing from something that I should of let Him take care of a long time ago.